Friday, January 28, 2011

Rant

Ok, I gotta get my thoughts out on here or I'm going to burst a fricken gasket and I don't care if other people read it because this is my blog and my journal in a sense.  So I've only gone on official dates with 3 different girls that I can think of since coming to Salem and of those three 2 of them have blatantly been fondling, wrestling, flirting up a storm, or something to that regard THE night before I have taken them out on a date WHILE I'm there.

I'm saying this because that is just what happened tonight and I'm going to be taking this girl out the next day for dinner and a movie that you can do at this place called Northern Lights.

Now I'm not asking for them to stop dating other people, nope, not at all.  I don't even mind if they want to keep their options open because that totally makes sense.  BUT could you have the decency to fricken play around with another guy AT LEAST when I'm not around or the night before a date.  It's a small request.  What bothers me just as much is that this girl has said on several occasions that she dislikes this guy for who knows how many reasons but yet her actions speak butt loads more than her words it seems.

I feel like the guy who has a sign over his head that says "use me" cause that's what it feels like.  What's sad is I will still take this girl out tomorrow and have to do what I did the last time and act like nothing even happened because I don't want to be the jerk that makes the night suck incredibly bad (even though it basically will since it's hard to enjoy the evening with the knowledge you have).

This girl has been incredibly open with me from the start so it sucks even more when I was pressured to tell her what was bothering me when this wasn't the first time she has done this but with some other guy each time at an activity while I"m there making me wonder if I should even be there.  She tells me that it's her insecure side coming out and she just likes to flirt.  Ok...but with the guy you incredibly dislike as well who you said you will only joke with now that you know what kind of guy he is...ok you're losing me now, I'm confused.

So me being the trusting guy cause that is what you are supposed to do to even get anywhere in life I say "ok" I'll just assume it really is your insecure side coming out, fine.  But there is a pretty obvious line between flirting and hanging all over a guy to the point that the guy is almost forced to push you away (the guy is one of my very good friends and yes he is a ladies man but he is trying for someone else and has said so).

Ok, the anger has subsided now and I think I can go to bed knowing that I won't do anything stupid.  Just a little frustrated by the turn of events.  I could go on much more involving txts and conversations I've had but it won't help anybody at this point and my mood is slowly going back to chill and I want to keep it that way.

We watched the movie Red tonight and it was fairly good.  Lots of big name actors and the storyline was not bad.  John Malcovich is really hilarious despite his creepy vibe that he always sends off but it worked incredibly well in this movie.  We also played 2 volleyball games for our city league team and we wrecked both teams we played.  I don't know what was the problem with one team but I was serving for honestly 10 straight points before they managed to have a decent return and finally win a point.  I started reading the second book in the series of "Gregor the Overlander, The prophecy of Bane."  Yes it sounds like a book for a teenager but that is what Kari has available and I burn through books with the amount of off time I have with this Masters program.

I think I'm done now. Night.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

I'm back, kinda :)

There will be no pictures in this post but it is sort my start to having some kind of journal since I have more free time now and I'd rather get in the habit of doing this instead of gaming or whatever other waste of time I can think of.  I don't play WoW anywhere which come as a surprise to some but it is a gigantic waste of time that pays off (in the cyber world) very little.  I'm taking up a game that costs no money whatsoever that I can play on my own time and for short bursts.  It's called League of Legends.  Now you might think "Oh great just another thing for him to waste time on" which would be entirely correct if I actually played a fair amount.

These past couple months I've been getting out almost every night with some friends from the Salem area (our ward if that helps put you at ease lol) to get me off my post and out of the house.  Right now we have stake basketball which is fun but we suck bad.  It is a good thing Gerrett is heading out on his mission in March instead of like February because we would be getting crushed even worse right now.  We have this mentally handicapped members who like to play which is fine but it destroys all hope of winning so you just have to sigh a little and take the losses with a grain of salt.

The other thing going on right now is city league volleyball on Thursday nights with some friends from the family wards.  We played our two opening games this past Thursday and won handily.  I got in some nice spikes that even surprised one of our members since she hadn't seen me play in a while (yeah, I got better, you can stop thinking "hah, yeah right" cause it's true I swear!).  I also got to see some of the better teams that were in our league that were ranked higher starting out and I'm pretty sure we can take them if we have our normal lineup with Gerrett taking Nate's place since he opted out (grr).

At church I'm the 1st counselor in the Elder's quorum presidency and basically take care of all that deals with the sacrament.  In addition I am the one that goes to all the activities so I know the members in our ward better than the ones that are actually from here...imagine that.  I gave a talk 2 weeks ago, I am giving the elder's quorum lesson tomorrow, and I am in charge of the ward's basketball games (making people aware of them and to actually show up since we only had 4 this past Wednesday, ugg).  So while I'm doing my Masters degree at Western (two days a week this term Woo!) what is really keeping me busy is all the ward stuff plus trying to get out of the house as much as possible (my gas money is getting wrecked!).  I figure in the end it's for the best and as long as I only spend money and time in this way I can only come out on top right? :)

Oh, I almost forgot.  I've got this nifty folder for all the music I carry around with me now and I can play practically every piece inside of it.  Now it isn't perfect but it is a whole heck of a lot better than in the past and when I practice after/before activities at the church I get a lot of head turns and questions ("dude, I didn't know you could play", bwahaha that's what they think) so I must not suck that bad lol.

Other then that I just read whatever book Kari shoves in my hands and I finish it within a week or two because of the way my classes are setup on Tuesday/Thursday.  Btw, I've read books now that I probably wouldn't have picked out myself but they have been rather good nonetheless.  Like one is called "What my girlfriend doesn't know" which is displayed in the book like a poem but reads like a normal book but is dang funny at parts but I never would have picked it up otherwise.  I almost didn't read it before/after classes because it just looked like a girly book and didn't want to have people catch me reading it but it was just so funny at times.

Anyways my mind is spent and I feel like I just wrote a short paper for a class that isn't giving me credit for it so I'm going to check out now :).